Month: February 2016

Top 5 Video Game Sequels That Will Never Happen.

Posted on by Dylan Nightingale

No this isn’t going to be one of those repetitive lists that are about some game that is in development hell… this is going to be a list featuring games (that aren’t going to happen) that are only in development hell in an overly obsessive fan’s mind.

5: SONIC ADVENTURE 3.

Sonic_Adventur_3

uh yah dis is liek real jus don mind the nintendo seal on the Ps4 cover, k.

Oh my God… if this offends you then don’t even bother commenting… it won’t happen OK? It could (which is why it is so low) but SEGA has never confirmed that they are(or aren’t) going to make the game. I really wish Sonic fans would stop making DUMB suggestions to SEGA (Like any new characters or gameplay mechanics that make no sense…)

4. SUPER MARIO RPG 2

SMRPG2

Uh… that was the only picture of Bowser’s head I could find on GOOGLE… sorry for the outline guys.

This was going to happen but the Paper Mario game (for N64) basically is what happened to that, of course fans of RPGs make petitions and rant about Nintendo literally just because they won’t freakin’ call Paper Mario a different name.

3. DuckTales 3

ducktales_3_nes_by_unclelaurence

The guy who made this did a pretty good job, but why the heck are they running away from a house that is being burnt by a dragon? I haven’t watched DuckTales for about a year but why?

Now there isn’t as much of a following for a third Ducktales, for pretty much all the reasons why it wouldn’t happen, but for the few people who do want a third I’ll tell ya why…

  • Ducktales ended in 1990(or was it 1989 or 91?) it is getting a 2017 reboot, but since it is a reboot they won’t make a follow-up to a pre-reboot game. (Confusing isn’t it???)
  • No one had Ducktales 2 and it is worth 200 bucks (way more than it should be) on eBay.

2 BattleToads 3 (or whatever)

battletoadsm

HAHA IT IS RATED M, I’M DYING.

So a ton of late 80s gamer punks think that BattleToads was the best beat-em-up game ever (even though they couldn’t beat the 3rd level).
I mean who even gave a crap about the BattleToads any way, it was a cheese-y knock-off of TMNT.

1 MineCraft 2

2minecraft4me

2 Minecraft? Is this game just too much Minecraft?

Ok, for starters the game came out in 2009 and it is a freaking fad POP CULTURE PHENOMENON and still hasn’t had a direct sequel, that and it already has a spin-off “MINECRAFT: STORY MODE” which is the most ridiculous name for a spin-off game, the title suggests that it is an expansions pack and not a stand-alone game. (Seriously that is the worst name.) But Mind-Craft fans still aren’t satisfied… even though most fans of that game don’t even play the original (un-modded) game.

You guys just go ahead and send me death-threats and I will approve them any-way so have fun gaming!

Have Comic Books Gotten Worse?

Posted on by Dylan Nightingale

SuperManRetarded

Nothing in between the ears.

You may be thinking that I am some sort of IDIOT over the title but that title while fitting, is not what this article is about. It is really about how Comics have gotten to be in a worse state since the days in the 40s-60s when some people still thought comics were “the devil’s spawn!” mainly because of comic movies. Which are great and all, but most people who claim to be Iron Man (or pretty much any other character, especially the Guardians of The Galaxy, which most folks had no idea existed until the movie) franchise fans haven’t even read a single comic. Not even a poorly “updated” reprint. But sure don’t even bother reading my article. You’ll just comment and bash me over a dumb article title. But first let us talk about improvements and a certain hedgehog.

SonicSteroid.jpg

The Sonic layer of the picture wasn’t even modified by me. It is from the first Sonic TV series, I’m serious…

I mean sure, quite a few comics have improved over the years. Like the Sonic Comics for example are now more similar to the actual Sonic games than ever before even in the early 90s when the comic first started and there wasn’t any evidence that the writers had been getting their material from some 16 year old girl’s Sonic Fan-fiction (Don’t even bother looking up what fan fiction is, it basically is just a really bad fan-written story. Please do not read any fan fiction, I do not need a law-suit over any mental damage that could possibly happen when you look up “fanfiction”, ok?) the art in Sonic comics even took a really bad dip from the 2000s-early 2010s and luckily they fired that artist. Completely…

BadArchieArt

This is surely the first thing you think of when you hear the words “Sonic The Hedgehog.”

I mean even Batman (in a way) is better now, with Robin being less of an annoying cheese-*ball* (not putting in the original word, k.)

robin.png

Seriously what is with those ripped up slippers, man?

And speaking of movies, Christopher Nolan’s Batman films were really good too. (It made us forget about George Clooney as BATMAN, yes that happened… you probably should call a doctor now.)

batmanvssupermanalreadyhappenedguys

Batman VS Superman already happened, so seriously what is with the darn hype? (Also why does it say MAY JUNE?)

 

But to be honest comic “fans” have gotten even worse than ever, I mean they claim to be comic fans but about 55% of ’em haven’t even read a single issue of a comic… not even that Darkwing Duck comic for God’s sake.

But then they will discuss comic movies, and they will literally say that a movie is good as long as it has a crossover, a ton of FX or even freaking Deadpool (or some other overrated Marvel character that everyone didn’t care about until 2010…)

deadpooledit.jpg

THIS IS 100% FROM AN ACTUAL DEADPOOL POSTER, I DID NOT EDIT IT IN ANYWAY!

they will go see it and act like it is better than freaking Star Wars (the original trillogy) or E.T. or maybe even Forrest Gump.

What I really hate, is that (I THINK CROSSOVERS ARE COOL, DON’T MURDER ME) movie companies think that what viewers want is strictly crossovers, never a solo-character film (excluding Deadpool) I mean a lot of people would like to see more solo-Batman and solo-SuperMan films but those just aren’t gonna happen for a while. Then what is worse is that they are going to hire an actor that nobody is gonna like (I personally don’t really care that Ben Affleck is Batman, but I don’t really think he was a great choice ever) for example Ben Affleck. You could say he is more hated than that George Clooney. And Ben Affleck’s film isn’t out yet.

Overall: I wish that “comic” fans would just shut up and stop making comics so hard to even still be a(n actual) fan of… as they disregard comics as the true material and only want to see “edgy” “cool” “Hip” “RADICAL EXTREME” comic movies.